How much have you discussed this issue with him? Do you know what lies behind his financial concerns? It will be difficult for you to address the problem if you don’t fully understand his underlying concerns.

I agree with another commentor who suggested that we need more details about your financial situation to get a better idea about where your husband is coming from, but since we don’t have that information, I’ll suggest that a budget might alleviate the problem. You and your husband could sit down together and figure out what you can comfortably spend each month on nonessential items so that your savings will still be there to cover all of the essentials like health care. That way, he can keep his saving mindset by continuing to cut back on some expenses, but at the same time, you can have some nicer things. You can forgo the nice dinner out so that you’ll have enough money left in the budget to stay in a nice hotel, for example. I don’t think this totally solves the problem from your perspective, but it might be a good compromise or a good stepping stone to more flexible spending habits in the future.

Another thing I would suggest is that maybe there are certain things he would be more willing to splurge on than others. Maybe, even though you have plenty of money now, he simply doesn’t care much about the quality of a hotel room and doesn’t see the need to spend more money on it than the bare minimum. But maybe there is something else he would actually enjoy spending his money on and you just need to find out what that is. I’m a big saver myself, but take me to a good restaurant and even I will open up my wallet.

I can’t believe that someone would suggest divorce as an option in this situation. That’s terrible.

Let us know if you have any success!

I think if you could find something that would show you percentages of what you should be spending on certain areas that it may help him. Also, like another poster said remind him who will be inheriting his money.

Also, total all monies that you have and show him how long it would last if you spent what you should be spending. I liked the ALL YOUR WORTH (Elizabeth Warren) book because she talks about people who are not spending enough on wants. Also, my step-father worried about health care taking all of his money. A lot depends on his health and how he sees himself. Many times people don’t talk about their health issues and lastly like someone else said, it’s also a mind-set.

They finally made a deal with each other after my grandmother put things in perspective for my grandfather– that they are not even spending what they make in interest. At 6% interest for a $1.5 million account, you will be making $90k/year. You can start by asking him if he think it’s fair to at least spend what you make from interest.

Of course, while the email does outline a relatively high level of of net worth accumulated, we don’t know the ages of the husband or wife or the rate at which they are spending their savings. If they are, for example, still relatively young and aggresively drawing down the principal amounts of their savings, then the husband may be justified in saying that “they need to save more”.

I would ask who sent in the letter to provide some more details of her situation so you can get a better idea of whether her position is justified.

I think the saving, investing, and “what is my net worth” philosophy has led many well-meaning people down a road to greed, selfishness, and a constant discontent feeling in their lives.

We do well to be frugal at times, save first and spend second, and invest for the future, etc., however, we have to do it all while maintaining the understanding that money, even well-intentioned money, is not the be-all, end-all and of course, “the love of money is the root of all evil.”