Don’t Hide Money In The Toilet: More Conversation With A Burglar

hide money in the toilet

With my previous post The Best Place To Hide Money – Conversation With A Burglar being one of my most popular posts ever on this site, there wasn’t any hesitation when I was at another gathering over the weekend and spotted the former burglar that had given me the information. I went straight up to him and asked if I could talk with him for awhile. This is what I learned from the second conversation we had:

Most people don’t understand the motivation of why the burglar is stealing. As he explained:

99% of the burglars on the street aren’t like the ones you see in the movies where stealing is their chosen profession. They are motivated by more sinister reasons. They a

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91 Responses to Don’t Hide Money In The Toilet: More Conversation With A Burglar

  1. Sam says:

    Not yet mentioned, a dog can be bribed with treats in seconds. Arrange things so it takes too much time for an intruder to make friends with fido.

    Never leave tools laying about the yard, they will use them to break in and then take the most worth stealing tools.

    I only keep a Safe for fire safety reasons for documents I am too lazy to take to the bank.

  2. Amanda says:

    There’s always money in the Banana Stand!

  3. Stephen S says:

    If someone is after a specific item you have – No amount of security will protect it.

    A crime of opportunity is different. Quality doors/locks that are actually used can drop the risk. Locked windows too.
    Security windows can do a lot. Generally expensive. plexiglass windows for the ones most likely to get busted are cheap.
    But.. If someone WANTS IN.. They will get in. Even the highest security locks used at places like the pentagon can be picked in seconds to minutes.

  4. Frank says:

    As has been mentioned the tins you can hide cash in are very well known, and the tin of “soup” in the bedroom stands out like a sore thumb.

    Unfortunately for the thief, if they touch the soup tin on the shelf in my bedroom, they will get an unpleasant electric shock (dog shock collar inside) and a loud siren (not in the can) will start wailing.

    Other valuable things, like my computer for instance, will trigger an alarm if they are carried across any threshold. (Rigged with one of those dog collars that trigger when it passes a cable. The cable is hidden alongside the thresholds.)

    Disabling requires a screwdriver or waiting until the internal battery runs out.

  5. Always Thinking says:

    I hide all of my big bills inside the picture of my Mother In Law , aint no one looking in there!!! That picture is better than a guard dog on PCP !!

  6. Deb says:

    I have been burgled at least 5 times in my life; different locations, cities, etc. And yes, my children’s room was ransacked. I have been a single mom for many years. My girls were 3 and 5 at the time, and their room was a MESS, but the burglers trashed it even more, especially the bed. I have had my refrigerator/freezer trashed, came home to frozen huckleberries melting all over the floor. At times I have had (in my opinion) NOTHING to steal, but they still took my ancient microwave when they couldn’t find anything else. They have taken spare car keys. I have almost always had dogs; but as someone mentioned, the thieves probably threw them a bone and the dogs went off happily and quietly to enjoy. But when the sheriff came, they barked like hell. Didn’t like the uniform I guess!

    I am almost to the point of just leaving the door unlocked, leave them a couple hundred bucks in plain sight, with a note for them to please take it. It would be cheaper than replacing doors and locks, windows, and cleaning up afterward.

    I have always been burgled in broad daylight, when at work and kids in school. Unless you live in a neighborhood with a nosy neighbor who stays home all the time, with a clear view of all angles of your home, you can be burgled any time and the thieves can be in and out with no one the wiser.

  7. helio says:

    Who DOESN’T keep income that was paid to them in cash? Put it in your bank account and you’ll have to explain to the IRS where it came from. If you clean houses or mow lawns for extra money (or to make a living), you’re sure not going to take it to the bank. At $80 to $100 a house, you only need 8 or 10 ladies to collect $1,000, specially if the ladies hire you to come in twice a month. Or even once a week, if you’re really lucky.

  8. Chris says:

    I have been robbed 13 times in the last 3 months and I like to hide all my cash in the manhole outside in my yard.I also keep some in a large dictionary that I cut a lot of the pages out so it looks normal, but when you open it, there is a large spacein the middle.I keep gold jewlery in melted candle wax.I keep my credit cards in my computer after I have unscrewed the cover off it.

  9. eilee says:

    I appreciated this article. I live with an emotionally challenged young adult who steals from me and the household. Until I can figure out how to teach her to not steal, I am glad to know these ideas for hiding my cash. I can’t leave all of my money in the bank. I need some ready cash. She would even take the needed change. I once had a safe, but she damaged it trying to open it. So, that’s out. Anyway, I can’t afford a more secure one. I am beginning to learn solutions to teaching her to respect my belongings. Thank you for this article. I will implement these locations and hopefully I will have success and peace of mind.

  10. Antony says:

    I liked this article. It

  11. jaycee says:

    I searched for “where to hide jewelry” then “where to hide valuables” and this site came up. My home was burgled once. I had my jewelry in a jewelry box on my dresser. He (a neighbor saw him and he was caught later) took only one item from the jewelry box. A piece of costume jewelry worth maybe one dollar. He left the emerald and diamond ring set in white gold. He left the diamond ring set in 18k yellow gold. In fact he left everything else in the box. Granted there was not much there but he took the largest and most intricate (gaudy) piece of jewelry in the box. Anyone who knows jewelry would know the stones on that piece were fake and worth nothing. It wasn’t even real silver. But he was not a jeweler, he was a thief. It was obvious he went through all the drawers in my home. The only thing he got was the cheap bracelet. He never found my purse which was actually in plain sight but not where most women put their purse. There was a few thousand in cash in it at the time. Turns out he needed cash. Don’t think he was a drug addict but stole money or valuables he could sell. I have learned not to put my jewelry in a jewelry box on the dresser. LOL My MIL puts hers in a shoebox in her closet — as if a burglar would never look there. I have to agree that if someone wants to steal something, they will find a way. But some burglars are not casing your home, they may just check for an unlocked door (or one easily opened). In this case, he had some gadget to open the garage door and knew most people do not lock the door from the garage to the house. He made his way in.
    I had a friend who dated a burglar, by the way. I learned a lot about where NOT to put things and most of what this has said is true. No lockboxes or safes are a deterrent. Once in, they can pretty much find something they think is worth taking. And NO don’t leave him cash somewhere – doh. At least make him work for it. A friend had a bike stolen even though it was locked. It’s no guarantee. As they say, locks are to keep HONEST people honest. i.e., don’t place temptation in their face as they may not be able to resist. A burglar or thief will do anything they feel they must to get what they want. One on drugs is a dangerous combination. Try your best to keep them OUT of your home first. i.e. security systems, dogs, signs stating you have them, etc. They say an ounce of prevention … etc.

  12. anuraj says:

    I agree with the last article i keep around 20-50 bucks on the coffee table in my living room. I figure the burglar would take that an run, and i was right. I got robbed a few days ago and the only thing that was missing was the 40 dollars i left on the coffee table. Im happy cus i have 400 bucks somewhere in my house

  13. Nead Digger says:

    You could put quarantine for small pox stickers on your windows and doors. Have dogs, keep a gun in your pocket in case you arrive home and a burglar decides to be a robber and attempts to force you to open a safe at gun / knife point. You could pull out your pistol and put a mag / cylinder of bullets into his / it’s head.

  14. Myself says:

    I keep about $1000 in my house, for reasons already mentioned here, among others. It’d be nice to go totally cashless, but I don’t like knowing Visa/MC get 3% of everything I spend (if you are paying with a debit card, the store is paying a fee, and I don’t like to stick small businesses with that.) I’d LOVE to get a dog but I’m not home enough, and in my #!$&@!! neighborhood, it’d probably get stolen for fighting or bait. Last fall, my big tv got stolen so now there’s nothing worth stealing (except the cash.) After reading this, I’ll be moving it- not to the bank, there’s plenty there already- to a safer hiding place I won’t disclose here. Off limits: bedroom, bathroom, kitchen, office, or any drawer (I’ve hidden $ in bathroom & office before, oops! And one place was so good I forgot I’d put it there.) I own LOTS of crap, none of which has a street value, much of which would be great to hide cash in/under! Thanks for the tips!

  15. Mark V. says:

    Doh! A couple folks have mentioned hiding cash or credit cards inside their computers, don’t! They are as likely as not to steal the computer, even if they sell it without finding it, you are out the whole lot!

  16. Eric says:

    I have been stolen from by my closest friends and family but never robbed. To be sure that I am only stolen from by friends and family and not strangers, I have recently purchased an ADT security system, a 10 gage shot gun, a 357 mag, and a Pit Bull (Betty, she’ll lick you to death but, don’t tell anyone). ;) I felt I had to “Fort Knox” myself. Come on guys, give it your best shot! lol

  17. Cholascaria says:

    The best way is to con the burglars. Lock a drawer you are willing to lose, then stash it with real jewelry boxes filled with fake but real-looking jewelry. Works for watchboxes too. There are too many high end imitation watches that you can put in the box. Just make sure you put in an LV watch for an LV box. Hahaha!

    Burglars loved the master bedroom where there are closets, drawers, etc and especially if it’s locked. Lose the original watchboxes, jewelry boxes, just dont lose the real thing :P

  18. BenFromTexas says:

    I don’t sweat it. I have a 110 lb pit bull and a .357 Magnum among other guns. I got out of the military recently and currently carry a weapon at work. If you want my flat screen or my loose change, come on in…I have 40 acres and a bulldozer. Nobody will miss you.

  19. J in LosAngeles says:

    You might have a variety of firearms, it will do you little or no good.
    Thieves are not paratroopers. They are not brave people and will not wish a confrontation.
    When you are gone they will steal your firearms too.
    A good electronic security system is your best bet.
    If you can’t afford a security system, get security window decals from the security company. They generally just give them to you.
    The thieve won’t know and he will go somewhere else.
    Not a guarantee but it is infinitely better than doing nothing.

  20. @Nead Digger says:

    Yea, good idea. Small Pox definitely wasn’t eradicated years ago.

  21. Lea La says:

    where do you hide a very large volt where it wont be found, walls outside?

  22. Enzo says:

    Our home was burglarized, the cop said he speaks with burgers he arrests all the time. They hate big dogs, surveillance cameras, alarms, alarm decals/signs. You can fortify you closet door where it would take 30 min to get through they sell the kits online. Most want to be in and out in 5-10 min. We did that, if they spend the time to get past the alarm, our security closet they will encounter the safe bolted down. We put our cameras, laptop and valuables there every time we leave. If they come while we are home and try to rob, no problem they will face shotgun and 9mm and I would love to test them out. Also our surveillance monitor is inside a safe like box bolted down in the attic. Remember nothing is full-proof.

  23. martin says:

    I found this article very interesting and thank you for sharing this but i never have enough money in the house to worry about hiding it

  24. Sheshe says:

    In our kitchen drawer we have a locked cash box that says “emergency cash” on it. It’s filled with newspaper cut like dollar bills and a couple bus tokens as “change”. It was stolen once (must be somebody we know, no sign of forced entry + we have alarm system).

    The thief thought he hit jackpot and left without trashing the place or getting any real valuables. Wish I could have seein his face when he got his “booby prize”!

  25. jj says:

    My advice is the same with valuables as well as password lists, wallets in pockets, etc.; provide exactly what the thief expects to find in the expected place as a decoy. Keep the real stuff and info in an unusual place.

    When I travel in rougher countries I actually have my old nonfunctioning cell phone in my front pocket, old credit cards, and 40 bucks in a wallet in my back pocket. Even if I were to be robbed I would just hand it over. My long term traveling stash of cash is in under the pad inside my shoe -very comfortable. My credit card that I hand to waiters has a three digit security code; but it is not the reight one.

  26. Kyti says:

    Found the previous article while searching for info on a noise my breaker box made. Though it didn’t pertain to my noise issue, I found the info helpful! when I was younger, I hide stuff I didn’t want my parents finding under the bottom drawers of my desk & dressers, if it was money, in an envelope taped under posterbord i’d cut the size of the drawer. Older now, when we have overnight guests, I put my valuables in the pockets of jeans, pants or any garment I can zip or button the pockets on & hang them in my closet. I even try to make sure the garment is far far from current fashion so it wont be taken with my valuables stashed in the pockets.

  27. Kate says:

    How about owning two or three of those executive protection German Shepherd Dog that inally have a chance to try out their exercises they learned at school. The kind of dogs that like to howl at the moon and walk around like they are King of the house so I think they are just waiting for that one moment to pounce on some bad guy so they can get a doggy bone to chew on :) How about letting berry bushes take over your yard and get some old jeeps parked in the front and back yard… and get an alarm , don’t forget the man eating venus fly trap plant
    dog bowl that says Killer on it ! Seriously when I was going though a divorce and had live alone I had all this materilistic crap in my house so I had this crazy idea I let the berry bushes grow big and tall in the back yard I let my exhusband park three or four jeeps in the yard he like to work on them …and when the new guy I was dating saw my house he laughed! He goes it looks like ten guys live there with dogs, and guns! The inside of the house was beautiful all remodeled and when it was time to sell house the landscapers came cleaned it up, the jeeps went away and threw some new paint on the house and I sold the house in ONE day I kid you not and I moved the hell out of there. Can the outside of a house deter bad guys maybe..

  28. Vanessa says:

    Paranoid! Why would you keep them there! You would easily be able to see the gold of the jewellrey through the wax of the candle! Why live in fear of being burgled?

  29. OMG says:

    Paranoid? Are you serious?

    “I have been robbed 13 times in the last 3 months”

  30. Maritza says:

    “13 times in the last 3 months ” I WOULD MOVE!

  31. Mac says:

    13 times in 3 months!!!! Why are you still living there? I would have moved after the second break-in. More fool you!!!

  32. Anonymous says:

    Yeah a gun is a great idea! Unless that person happens to be an experienced fighter, then what? Also another idea for you: what if he/she sees you reaching and gets trigger/stab happy?

  33. Allie says:

    wow, i didnt know fast food could be thieves! the more u kno

  34. josh says:

    haha. very good. I used to hide money inside the metal legs of the kitchen table. just remove the rubber feet, and check whether you can put something in or not.

  35. Ski says:

    If you have a child or family member stealing from you, you need to do more than just hide your valuables. Tell that person if they do it again you’ll call the police. You don’t have to press charges the first time, but you’ll make your point loud and clear. I only had to do it once with my teenager and they never stole from me again. It should go without saying that if you put that threat out there, it’s absolutely crucial that you follow through on it.

  36. lein says:

    “My front door is locked for your protection, not mine!”
    6 dogs; Rottweiler-2, lab-2, golden, and the true guard dog, a miniature dachshund! Not to mention my 4 roommates, all of us vets, with PTSD and guns..
    We fought for the liberty of all, even the degenerates, but if those thugs dare come to my home, they will NEVER enjoy liberty again-

  37. Marsha says:

    I would invest in some boobie traps and security system… especially after the second time… maybe even security cameras :) so you could catch the bastards! Probably the same people doing it…

  38. Carolyn says:

    Love it; and thank you from 1 veteran to another (Vietnam-era female veteran). Good luck with the PTSD-it wasn’t called that when my fellow soldiers returned from ‘Nam. America was boon-
    swaggled by the media to hate those that went to protect it. definitely a different time…But, we patriots know how to deal with idiots that attempt to “try” us. My dogs, CHL, shotgun and 9mm will protect me more than any law can. Exterior signs, good lighting outside the house, signs on the vehicle, good communication with neighbors, being involved in the neighborhood (I patrol with Citizens on Patrol, alone, after 10pm), etc., are great deterrent for keeping you and your surroundings safe.

  39. DS says:

    Why would you have overnight guests that you do not trust?

  40. SB says:

    Um… moving isn’t such a bad idea…

  41. SB says:

    i love it thx!!

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